Digital Detox: Reclaiming Your Life on Social Media

As of January 2019, Facebook has 2.38 billion monthly users and owns two other major social media and messaging platforms: WhatsApp and Instagram. Mark Zuckerberg, the creator of Facebook and essentially the father of social media, shared his reasoning behind creating this Goliath: “You could find music; you could find news; you could find information, but you couldn’t find and connect with the people that you cared about, which as people is actually the most important thing.” If his intention was to connect us with the people we care about and bring humanity closer together, then why do I see social media driving my peers apart? I don’t have the answer, but I can offer a theory: Zuckerberg gave the platform he created to us with the expectation and trust that we would know how to maximize its inherent potential. The problem is, we don’t know how to use the platform. If we did, social media would not distort our reality and leave us isolated from one another.

February 4, 2004: The day a teenager named Mark Zuckerberg sat in his dorm room and turned his dream of connecting the world into reality. April 10, 2018: The day Mr. Zuckerberg testified before Congress in response to Facebook’s data sharing scandal. I admire the teenager who had a vision but not the man who profited from our information, and in doing so lost our trust. He was naïve to believe his dream would remain untainted. Somewhere along the way, the realities of running a business in a monetary world corrupted a teenager’s admirable vision. It took Zuckerberg fourteen years to realize the flaw in his creation: Facebook’s original mission statement was, “Making the world more open and connected.” Now their mission is, “To give people the power to build community and bring the world closer together.” What Zuckerberg discovered was that technology alone cannot “make” the world come out a certain way; all you can do is provide people with the tools that help them enact the changes they want to see. Because, at the end of the day, the power lies with the people.

If you want social media to empower you, then you have to grab the reins of your digital life. The first step is to realize that these platforms have been designed to manipulate you. That’s fundamental to their business model. If you don’t believe me, just listen to what the former president of Facebook, Sean Parker, revealed in 2011 about Facebook’s motives: “How do we consume as much of your time and conscious attention as possible?’ And that means that we need to sort of give you a little dopamine hit every once in a while, because someone liked or commented on a photo or a post or whatever, and that’s going to get you to contribute more content, and that’s going to get you more likes and comments. It’s a social validation feedback loop. … You’re exploiting a vulnerability in human psychology.” I don’t know about you but I hate being manipulated. So, if you want to flip the switch and regain power, simply put on your “introspection cap” and gut your social media.

Strap on that cap and be honest as you look at each of your posts and at each account you follow. Ask yourself what your intention was when posting that picture with a witty caption, or why you chose to follow the account where once a week you see different versions of the same thing. Were your posts to fit an aesthetic, or to act as a time capsule of cherished moments? Do you follow that account because it fills your feed with amusing content, or because it lets you know how a childhood friend is doing? Did you double tap on their picture out of habit or out of choice? Do you see your friends, do you see yourself, or do you see digital facades? It’s up to you to know the difference.

The depth of the connection you create on social media is entirely dependent on the content you share, and the content you choose to view. If you choose to create a facade and project only what you want people to see, then you are not establishing meaningful connections.

You are merely making imaginary friends. Social media, in theory, should bring us closer together; but that happens only if we use it genuinely. What was invented to connect us is, in actuality, driving us apart, further disconnecting us not only from reality but, more importantly, from each other. Strap on that “introspection cap” and stop counting how many likes and followers you have, because at the end of the day all that matters is the life you have lived, not the one you have scrolled through.